How online dating helped me find a good flat

Bear with me, this post may sound completely naive and whiny….but finding a decent place to live has been the hardest thing about Auckland so far. Now I accept that this might be because I’ve never lived anywhere farther than an hour from my hometown, and I’ve never lived in a city, and I’ve certainly never lived in an expensive city halfway across the world. So a lot of my difficulties could easily be just growing pains and learning curves of life in a new city anywhere. But thankfully house hunting and online dating are so similar that I had this one under control…

  • It always seems like such a good idea at first, and it’ll be SO easy

NZ has an awesome website to buy and sell just about anything you could imagine, so of course that’s where I started my search. I looked before I left the US, and there were *tons* of 1 bedroom apartments listed right in the heart of the city, and in my price range to boot. I gave myself 10 whole days to find a place to live and get settled in before I had to start work. In Dallas I could have found a nice cheap apartment in a great part of town, ready for me to move in immediately, in less than an hour! I flipped through pages of listings, painstakingly building a portfolio of favorites based on their few pictures and 2 sentence descriptions. Optimism, I had tons of it!

  • Then it quickly becomes an all-consuming job

…..until I actually started looking at places. I quickly found out that one does not simply make an appointment to view an apartment. All apartments units are independently owned/managed. So there could be 3 vacant apartments in the same building, and you might never know unless you happened to know a guy who knows a guy who’s renting one of the apartments. I pounded the pavement and texted/called people all day every day trying just to SEE apartments. I looked at roughly 6 apartments per day all over the city, each one more depressing than the next!

  • Absolutely NOTHING is as good in person as it is online

What I didn’t realize about Auckland is the sheer number of students and immigrants who live here. The university draws heaps of students, and the skills shortage list draws heaps of immigrants for work. As a result, there is a pretty huge housing shortage. Most of the 1 bedroom apartments I looked at (and we’re talking *small* apartments, around 500sqft) were occupied by several people. One of the first places I looked at was so adorable online–fully furnished (and they were buying new furniture!), right in the CBD, gets the north sun so it’s warm, and was an actual 1 bedroom, not an open plan. After seeing it in real life, I’ve realized that *nothing* is as charming in real life as it is online. The reason they had to buy new furniture was because FIVE guys were living here, and the place was absolutely destroyed. No amount of cleaning could have saved it. Oh and did I mention they were still asking $1650/month for it?

  • At some point you give in and lower the standards you thought you had

Unfortunately for me, after 6 solid days of looking (you did the math right, I saw over 30 apartments), I had found nothing that I would even consider living in. I was staying at a nice apartment with an awesome couple at the time, and they suggested that I find a roommate. I refused for the entire week, still trudging to apartment after apartment and getting more depressed. Thankfully for me, my airbnb host is amazing, and she looked for a roommate for me. Every night I would come home and tell her how horrible the apartments were, and every night she would watch TV with me and send me links to roommate postings. Finally I gave in and contacted one that was just outside of the CBD, in the suburb where I would be working. It was a cute, clean flat that was more modern than anything I’d seen yet.

  • Occasionally you DO find a unicorn

I am SO HAPPY that I came to see the apartment. Once I saw it, I couldn’t see myself living anywhere else! The guy who was renting it was in his late 20s, very smart and we had nice conversation, especially for being perfect strangers. The apartment was in just as good of shape in person as it was online! The bedroom I was looking at even had its own bathroom, and looked out onto the patio. Once I saw the place, I was smitten–I *had* to have it. So, just like dudes, the nice ones are few and far between, so you have to work to get them. It really felt like a job interview, trying to figure out what I could do to make myself the most desirable candidate!

  • You know when you’ve found “the one”

Thankfully I was contacted the next day to come and meet the 3rd person who was living in the apartment to see if we all got on well so that they could decide between me and the other candidates. I put on my cutest outfit and my best charming smile, gave myself a Stuart Smalley pep talk, and had my airbnb host look me over with the critical eye of someone she’d consider sharing a kitchen with. I met the other flatmate (a girl), and the three of us sat awkwardly at a small table and made small talk. It was truly one of the most awkward first dates I’ve ever had. I’ve never understood people who weren’t themselves on dates, who were constantly trying to be charming and cool and impressive…until I was that person, desperately seeking the approval of two strangers from the internet. Thankfully we all got along like gangbusters, and I went home with the successful-first-date high. I was singing from rooftops, shouting my love for my new place, exactly like an annoying teenager in love.

  • You can’t imagine how your life was before

I’ve heard so many horror stories about terrible roommates–messy, mean, weird, cruel. Our little place is actually a home–we watch TV on the couch, stay in on Friday nights, take walks to the park or the beach, dish on our love lives, and listen to each other’s whining. Even though I’ve always lived by myself, now I can’t imagine not living with my flatmates. Awwwww…..